OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
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