I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
