you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
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