This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
