I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
