Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Do vagina's smell?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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