Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
