Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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