Michael Bay diarrhea
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You're breaking my sexual little heart
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
