So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
