Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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