Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
