Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
