I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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