yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
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