kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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