Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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