I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
