is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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