I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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