Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
