i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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