That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
