why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
