Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
