We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
