I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Come share oat with me in your robe
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
