Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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