it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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