when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
