Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
farters have to be the big spoon...
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
