It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
