You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
