I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I forgot how hot balto sounded
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize