this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
