it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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