I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Randomize
