We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize