Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
