I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
