I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
be right there i have to get my cape
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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