I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
