That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
