I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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