i would punch a child for taco bell
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
