I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
