We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
