We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
