Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
