I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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