The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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