whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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